Tucker: Money, why didn't I think of that?
Church: Because you don't have any money.
Tucker: Good Point. Hey Caboose, gimme some money.
Caboose: Ok-wait, is this a trick? I'll pay you $100 to show me how it works.
Oh, that’s right. She’s not your girlfriend. Just the girl that you’re stalking...– Tucker, Red vs Blue Season 9 Ep. 16 (via starshipwho)
Red vs. Blue continues to be hilarious
Soldier one: Hey, did you hear that noise?
Soldier two: Probably the sound of you being an idiot.
Soldier one: Ah, you're probably right...dickbiscuit.
Time isn’t made out of lines! It’s made out of circles. That is why clocks are...– Michael J. Caboose. (via b0nsly)
A great love is a lot like a good memory. When it’s there, and you know it’s...– (via ctsdesigns)
m-azing: Grif: “Listen, once when we were kids, we went ice skating, and she fell through the ice. She was under there for three hours, and when they pulled her out, not only was she still alive, she was pregnant. If you can explain that to me, I’ll believe you when you tell me she’s dead.”
m-azing: Simmons: Hey guys, do you ever notice Blue team has, like a lot more stuff going on than us? Sarge: Yeah. Boring stuff. Grif: Nerdy stuff. Simmons: Yeah but I mean, all we ever talk about is food and guns. Grif: That reminds me, I’m hungry. Sarge: Stop complaining or I’ll shoot ya in the head.
Caboose: If I've been bitten by one of them, does that mean I'm going to turn into an alien too?
Church: Shut up, Caboose.
Church: Shut. Up. Caboose.